Type: Lounge
Class: Dive

Inside of the Moon Temple Restaurant is a seedy lounge area named the Mandarin Room. Immediately upon walking in you can tell that this is not exactly what you would call a high-class joint. In fact, you might be tempted to call it a dive. The lighting is dim, the decor is questionable, but all in all, it has a nice divey feel without actually having a divey clientele.

The lounge itself probably seats about thirty to forty people, depending on how friendly everyone is. There really isn't a lot of standing room, but this isn't a standing room kind of place. There is also a "banquet" area in the back, but while it is big, it isn't "nice."

The drinks were exceptionally strong (I could not really taste the orange juice in my screwdriver.) The real bonus here though, is that there is full kitchen service to the bar. The Sweet and Sour pork (I think) that we ordered had a generous portion, good flavor, and inexpensive price tag. The waitress was nice, but there was only the one of her for I think the whole seating area, thus leaving her a little over worked.

All in all though, it is a good place to sit with friends, have a few drinks and order to some food before going out. I give it 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

When we walked in I was immediately struck by how nice this place looked. While the entire place maybe seats about 30 to 40 everything looked to be of exceptional quality. The walls were painted red, but there was a lot of texture and the artwork was excellent. Walking in, you could immediately see the cooking area. I always consider this an excellent sign.

We were immediately shown up to the "bar", which was really just a little area room to the right that had a bar, a couple of tables and a couple of booths. It was very cozy, and I could easily see taking a date here for a nice quiet dinner.

I ordered a Side Car and while the drinks were a little pricey, they were excellent. Now I should mention that when I say pricey, I mean the drinks cost about $6, but at least you can taste the quality. This is not a problem as long as you can afford the quality.

The wait staff was all cute and attentive. Our waitress was very friendly and was happy to explain the various drinks on the specialty menu. It always nice to have staff that seems to really care about (even if they are only paid to be nice.) Oh one last note that struck me as nice. After we had finished our drinks they came up to check if we wanted another. Now despite the fact that they were obviously about to close, they sincerely seemed to be happy to let us have another drink and allow us to just lounge around, while they worked. We declined, but it was nice anyhow.

All in all, while this is really a place for dinner, I am happy to give it 3 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5. It is definitely above average, even if your just going for drinks.

-w00t

Type: Irish Pub
Class: Mid-Scale

Now before I totally pan this bar let me start by saying, that yes ... we only had one drink there. The atmosphere seemed ok (if you like the backward hat, Abercrombie & Fitch wearing white guy.) But what it comes down to is this. THE DRINK I HAD WAS ASS*!!!.

I ordered a G&T. The glass I got was like a normal glass' younger brother who had not yet hit puberty. The drink itself was as weak as a ten-year-old girl. Generally I like a little tonic with my gin, but in this case, I got the feeling that the drink was actually catholic and its father owned a gun. The gin was introduced to the tonic but it wasn't actually allowed to touch it.

Now if you are ordering beer and like Abercrombie & Fitch, this is the place for you. If you like your Gin and Tonic to be doing the nasty then go to Changes across the street.

I give this place 1 Martini Glass crushed beneath your boot out of 5.

*ASS:
1) To be truly and completely horrible
2) To smell like a person's posterior

-wOOt

Type: Sports Bar
Class: Mid-Scale

Goldie’s is a sports bar, pure and simple. It has no pretensions about what it is (except for the dusty espresso machine off to one side.) It has four or five pool tables, four dart machines, sports video games, numerous TVs, and you can answer trivia to cut your bar bill in half. We had a great time here. When we went on Thursday, it was not crowded and while I don't really go for "sporty" women, or "sporty" men groupies (also a type of woman), the women here were plentiful and cute.

We played darts, drank our drinks, watched the updates on March Madness, and just generally had a good time. I don't really have that much else to say, other than that I really liked the place. I give it 3 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Dive

I have very little to say about this bar except for the following things:

1) It is a gay bar
2) They have a pool table
3) The drinks are cheap and good ($3.50 for Finlandia Cran and Cranberry Juice)
4) They had Golden Girls playing on several of their TVs.

Now I don’t really know how to feel about this whole Golden Girls issue. When I was younger I always used to watch this show as it was part of the regular line-up. But looking back at the show now, it just kind of gives me the willies. Did you know that there are actual Golden Girls Groupies, out there? Kind of frightening if you ask me.

All that being said, as I am not gay, I will simply give a nice standard 3 Martini Glasses out of 5. If you are gay, you might want to add another glass to that.

-wOOt

Type: Irish Pub
Class: Dive

This is your standard neighborhood Irish pub (sort of.) There is nothing special about this place unless you like substandard Karaoke, and bartenders who scoff at your ideas.

The drinks were average, they have a single pool table and a dartboard (real darts however). Generally I might consider rating them a little higher, but with The Tin Hat, right next door, there is absolutely no good reason to go here.

I give it 2 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Sports Bar
Class: Average

This is your typical University Sports bar, but that’s not a bad thing. When we were there it was empty, which I will say was a little strange for about 9 pm on a Friday, but I imagine the crowds come later.

It is dim, cool (temperature wise), had several TVs and a couple of very cute waitresses. There are two dartboards and a pool table. There is a "dance" floor (I think that’s what it was) in the center of the place. They were offering $3 Long Island Ice Teas. They were crappy bar Long Islands, but who I am too pass up strong drinks cheap. I was tempted to stay for another, but it is only day two of our quest, so I am going to have to stick to the rules. Only one drink per place while there is still drinking to do.

Jason ran into a friend of his, Dan, who is, according to Jason, "the best looking guy I know." Now I am not really a good judge of how attractive a man is (as that is not how I swing) but I will say, that he was good looking. In addition, I guess he is very creative and liked our idea. He said that he was going to make us some business cards. I hope that this is the case, especially if he is as talented as Jason describes.

I am not a big fan of sports bars, but I suspect this one is pretty good. So I give it 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

Class: Neighborhood Bar
Type: Average

There is no other way to describe Flowers other than as cozy. All of the tables are very close together and the lighting is dim and friendly. The tables are smaller than average and the whole effect is to give one a sense of friendliness or claustrophobia, depending on which way you swing. The decor is nice, I guess, but it is really just a hodge podge of stuff that simply adds to its cozy feel.

The clientele though, is the reason to go to Flowers. It is always filled with higher quality co-eds than you would get at a place like the All American. The problem lies in the coziness though. There is not really room for you to stand and flirt with your neighbor. It is great if you are going with a small group, but trying to meet people here requires you to "accidentally" eavesdrop on a conversation, which is almost a requirement.

The G&T was strong and good. I liked the atmosphere, but it would have been better with a group rather than just Jason and I. I give this bar 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Nightspot
Class: Mid-Scale

We went to Rain Dancer to see a friend of Jason's band perform. Now I accept $5 cover to get in, but I should at least mention that I really hate cover charges. We did not have a cover charge at Zach’s, and a lot of places skip the cover, cause your drinking. But really, I accept it and move on. The part I am going to gripe about though, is the fact that it was a cash only bar. I am not sure if they are always a cash only bar, if their credit card machine was on the blink, or what, but I HATE cash only. I would prefer to live in a cashless society. If I could swipe my debit card through a soda machine I would and I would be blissfully happy for those 10 seconds I didn't spend digging through my pockets for change and then feeding the machine. This cash only bar problem is compounded by the fact that I just spent most of my cash at the All American and at Flowers. But who could have predicted.

Rain Dancer's layout is split into 3 main areas: Front seating, bar w/ island standing room, and a performance/food area.

The Front seating area has high chairs and small round tables perfect for two. Alternatively you can do what we did and shanghai the entire area and just stand and sit as you like.

The bar area is long and wavy and looks nice. Next to it is the prime flirting area with a stand up island and very little room. Thus you can place your drinks down but you have to keep squeezing up to the person next to you so people can scoot on by.

The back area is a large seating area, with a small clear area to dance (not that anyone did.) The stage is well sized and it is an excellent place to see a nice intimate show.

I do have one other major complaint about the place, and that would be the men's bathroom. The men's bathroom is a single room with a toilet, a urinal, a sink, and NO LOCK!!. You will be in there pissing and then some other guy walks in and uses the other facility. Then a 3rd guy comes in and just stands in a corner cause there is no more room, and then finally a 4th guy opens the door, sees the situation and decides that he can hold it. Now if you don't have to piss then this is real damn problem. Lets just say that I do not approve of this situation at all.

So to sum up: Good space to see a band. Cash bar sucks. Nice place for socializing. Bathroom sucks. Drinks are pretty good. So I guess it evens out to a 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Nightspot
Class: Mid-Scale

The Sit and Spin is probably one of the most unique establishments in all of Seattle. It is one part 24 hour Laundromat, one part bar, one part restaurant, and one part concert space. It does all of these thing moderately well. The drinks were average, the piece of pizza I had was decent, the washing machines seemed fine, and the concert space was cozy.

The Sit and Spin does not have a lot of room devoted to one thing, but I think the mix was interesting enough that I would come back here, especially if I needed to do laundry at 11:30 PM. They had several old video games (Galaga and Centipede - oh how I hate you spider) and the wait staff was both friendly and mean spirited. Jason pointed out that they had OEB (Old English Bitter?) on draft. I guess that’s a good thing, but I'll stick to my snooty micro-brews and G&Ts, thank you.

The concert space seriously lacked for seating (it had about 10-15 people worth of seating around the edges) but once the show started all of the standing people would block your view. We saw several bands there, and sound system varied from being decent, to being very loud when the drummer struck the Timpani (made me wince every time.)

All in all, I really liked it and would definitely go back. I give it 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Hotel Bar
Class: Upscale

The Brasserie Margaux is located in the Westin Hotel (Ed note: Actually, as bardude points out, it is the Warwick - sorry Warwick) across from the Cinerama. Just walking into this hotel bar you can tell that it is a nice comfortable place where you can have an excellent drink and just sit and talk with some friends or that "special someone."

Sitting down, the first indication that this is a really nice place is that there are no prices on your drink menu. But since we about to have our first official sponsor, thanks to Wolf, we figured it should be a nice place, and he wasn't complaining.

Jason ordered a Lemon drop and I ordered a Cremesicle. Man those were some excellent drinks. It was all top shelf booze and you could taste it. Mine of $7.50 and Jason's was $6.50, but it was worth it.

I really loved it here and could easily spend more time here. It was not crowded on a Saturday night, if that is what you like, and I imagine the food is also excellent. We had some bar snacks and those were tasty. I give 4 and Half Martini Glasses our of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Upscale

We walked into the Dahlia Lounge at about 11:15 on a Saturday night. Walking through the front entrance we were greeted by a well-dressed gentleman who gave us a nod. I think he could tell we were not there for food. I would like to start by saying that decor was excellent. It was set in soft reds, with nice colored paper lanterns, and dark wood. It had a very downtown cosmopolitan feel.

The bar was well stocked and even though the place was mostly empty, there was, relatively, a bunch of wait staff. I got the feeling that dinner had just ended and that they were still open mainly to clean up and serve some last booze to those straggling denizens of downtown.

We ordered our drinks and sat in a tiny booth. Now, unfortunately, the drinks had the prices of a downtown bar, with the quality. My G&T tasted, well, ... off. I don't know if it was cheap gin, if it was poorly mixed, or if it was just an average G&T and I had just had a truly excellent Creamsicle Martini over at the Brasserie Margaux. But it was definitely nothing to write home about.

While I suspect that the food is very good, and that this would a great place to bring a date you would like to impress, bringing her to the small bar area for a quick drink is not the way to do it.

I found the place to be a typical downtown establishment: Pretty, expensive, but only of average quality drinks. As such I give it 2 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Lounge
Class: Dive

The Rickshaw is full of true seedy goodness. This place is one part diner one part Chinese food restaurant, and one part bar. They host Karaoke nights, serve questionable but edible diner food (which is good, but in a diner kind of way), and have the longest happy hour known to man (from 7am to 4pm, everyday, I think.)

You could tell that our waitress was a goddess of the dive and would be equally at home slinging plates, pouring booze, or putting a big drunk guy in his place. Despite the fact that I outweighed her by probably 100 lbs, there is no way, I would ever be willing to stand up to her. She just had that "look" about her.

Our drinks were strong and cheap (just like the booze they use). The kitchen stays open until a midnight, but supposedly you can usually get food after that, since the cooks are also the night cleaners (I'm not sure how I feel about that.)

All in all, a great Sunday morning hangover cure. I give it 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Dive

The Canterbury Ale and Eats is located on the north most edge of 15th in Capitol Hill. Even from the outside, you can tell that it has a distinctive feel (whether you like that feel or not.) I have always had a soft spot for faux Olde' English style places in the US. They are pure kitsch (tacky but in a good way.) The outside is modeled like a medieval pub, with olde' style woodworking and a sign that hangs in front proclaiming where you are.

When you enter initially, there is a small dining area with well-worn old dark wood. It would look really nice except for the fact that it is all obviously just worn down. To the left is a small dining area where people seem to be enjoying dinner. The bar area is dark and smoky. We get drinks that are effectively $3 doubles. They are not good drinks, but they are sizeable drinks. Off in a side room, only accessible through the bar are several pool tables. The people standing around them, are dive people. They fit right in.

You know you are in Capitol Hill when you look up at the Pull-tab machine and there is a big bowl of free condoms sitting on top of it. I will also mention that this happens to be the closest bar to Volunteer Park. Now, I'm saying anything about that except, well I am. On a completely unrelated note, I was sitting in the chair that rests in front of the game machine, and it kept spinning me back towards the games. It was like the chair was programmed to draw its sitter to the game so that they would have to drop a quarter in, if only to appease the hungry beast.

On a side note, I have eaten there before and while the food is not terrible, it is not good either. It is a good dive, and probably the only one you can find on the hill (other than the Comet.) While their drinks are strong, the atmosphere was too oppressive for me to really get into drinking there. The Canterbury is a good stop, but not a destination. I give it 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

--wOOt

Type: Lounge
Class: Mid-Scale

The Satellite has a Martini Bar feel, without actually really having the martinis. The lighting is soft, the seating is spacious (if you can actually get some), the food is good, the art is, well, Capitol Hill wall art. There is room for live music in the back, but to be perfectly honest the place is too small to allow the band to play and to allow you still carry on your conversation and anything less than a dull roar.

Normally the service her is pretty good, but tonight, the waitress was slow to come over and our Sponsor came back with the following story, "So I order the drinks and the bartender is looking confused. She casts around and stares are the bottles before her. She just can't seem to find what she is looking for. Finally, she turns to her co-worker and asks, 'Which one is the rum?' " Now here is my point. She may be new, but if she has ever made a drink in her entire life, then she should be able to read the labels and figure out which is the rum bottle. It doesn't take a brain surgeon to mix a rum and coke, but I suspect it might help.

The drink was passable, nothing special. I have had their seafood pasta primavera that was just great. But instead of staying to eat we just drank our drinks and moved on. I wish I could comment on the prices but our Sponsor paid, so I don't know.

When it comes to women, the Satellite does attract a high quality gal. Unfortunately, it also attracts her high quality boyfriend. This is really a date place, rather than a drinks place. I give it 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

--wOOt

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Mid-Scale

The Elysian Brewery is very spacious, has some comfortable booths, but is mainly only ok table seating. There is typical Brewery decor and to be perfectly honest, how many times can you be impressed with a place decorated with giant beer vats that they don't let you drink out of.

The menu here is highly questionable, in that it has that bizarre health nut/trendy Capitol Hill styles where everything sounds like something that you would normally eat, but has all sorts of unusual ingredients that really you would rather avoid.

Now I realize that this is a brewery, but whatever you do, DO NOT DRINK THE BEER. I know a number of people who have gotten ill from drinking the beer here. I don't mean, too much beer so I'm puking in some stranger's yard, amounts. I mean, a beer or two and now I think I am sick. We were sticking with hard liquor anyhow and you don't have to worry whether the gin has turned.

The Elysian appears to be a great place, but when you look closer, it is just a large eatery with a questionably trendy menu and your standard fair of drinks. I will say that I have drunk the Dragon's Tooth Oatmeal Stout and while I didn't get sick, it was not really a good beer. If you are looking for average drinks (the hard stuff), a place to sit and chat with your friends, and an "experimental" menu, then this is the place for you. If you want the same thing, but better, go to the Satellite Lounge down the street. Then when you discover that there is no seating in the Satellite Lounge because it is kind of small, come back here and grab a table.

I give it 2 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

I really liked this place. The drinks, well, I can't even say. I don't even rightly recall what I had. I'd presume a Screwdriver. But that doesn't matter. On the first night, when we hit seven bars, this one still seems special. And for several reasons.

First, the staff were nice. When we told a waitress our idea, she didn't think we were crazy, she thought it sounded fun. I like this.

Second, the place is pretty friendly in general. There's a good amount of room, but it's split up into smaller areas by partial walls and suchlike. It's both open and cozy. And it was neither too bright, nor pitch black, the usual bar extremes which can often annoy.

Third, they had Yahtzee. Okay, maybe we just got a good table, but still, they had Yahtzee. And okay, I got my ass handed to me, and Sean sadly had his perfectly good win stolen from him by Brandon's last minute second Yahtzee, but that's rather unimportant in the scale of things. They had Yahtzee, you see.

Did I mention this was #6 of the night?

Still, it was a great place.

Located in the Moon Temple, what can you say about the bar in a Chinese restaurant where you can get the full menu?

You can say, Hell Yeah!

The staff is attentive, the food is pretty good, the portions are generous and the drinks, while not great, didn't suck either. And they were pretty strong. Everyone was nice, and the waitress we had was cute, if you like the ladies.

Good starting point for your night, in other words. With food and pretty strong drinks, and everything at reasonable prices, you can't go wrong.

Okay, by our actual rules, I don't think this place qualifies. But the rules were really shaky that first night. So although the bar isn't really open after the restaurant closes, and although it doesn't really have a seperate identity like the Mandarin Room, I'm still counting it.

It's a nice place. Very nice. Looks good, although it's very small, and the drinks were tasty, if a bit more than I like to pay. But you get what you pay for, and at the Jitterbug, it shows. They close kind of early, but even as they were closing, they asked with seeming sincerity if we wanted another drink. Not in the "Anything else?" way that implies, could you go please, but rather as if they really wanted to be sure we had consumed our fill.

Good place.

Type: Nightspot
Class: Mid-Scale

Before we walked into The Wild Rose, I must admit that I was apprehensive. It is well known to be a lesbian hangout, and while I did not actually think I was going to get beaten up by a big butch lesbian, I couldn't be sure. But it is a bar in Seattle and it is close to my house, so we had to go there.

Walking in I could tell that I would go to this bar regularly, if it were not for the fact that I doubted there were any single women there interested in men, let alone me. It has ample bar space, numerous tables, interesting signage, a pool table (or two), a juke box, $2 Wells on Thursday, and a Count Chocula Bobble Head Doll.

When we walked in (three guys) no heads turned, there was no outcry against the male oppressors, and the bartender immediately came over and asked us what we wanted. Florence is excellent. She made us great drinks, didn't mock our quest, gave us swag, and was generally really amazing. Everyone needs to visit this bar and say hi to Florence (She's the tall busty Blonde).

The most bizarre part of the evening, would be when these two guys came in and tried to sell totally miscellaneous merchandise to Florence and her co-worker. They had coin sorter, a singing, skating Dani doll, and some other stuff. Florence said that this has only happened to her about 3 or 4 time in four years, so don't expect them to show up on your visit, but hey, who knows.

All in All, I give the Wild Rose Four Martini Glasses out of Five, but only because I'm not a lesbian.

-wOOt

It's kind of late, so I'll make this short.

Murphy's is the bar to go to with all your college friends. Get a pitcher. Take over a table in the noisy but spacious interior. Sit by the fire if you want. But don't, I repeat don't, order a cocktail, even though they'll have a sign suggesting just that. You'll wonder two things: Am I suddenly in Lilliput, because this is a small glass, and, Is there a shortage of alcohol, cause they didn't give me my fair share.

But other than that, it didn't suck. Like I said, a good place for a crowd.

Type: Hotel Bar/Restaurant
Class: Upscale

Your first real experience with the Dragonfish, comes when you walk into the small pre-lobby and are faced with two enormous wooden doors. These doors are just plain imposing and might cool. They have some weight to them as well and this very definitely adds to the mystique.

When you get in there however, you find a bizarre, interesting, and eclectic mix of styles and moods all under one roof. We went in on a Friday night at about 7:00 pm and it was just positively packed. Since we were there just for a drink, they let stand in the bar. There was no seating available, but we could stand if we liked. We did so.

The bar is probably the most interesting portion of the Cafe anyhow. There is nicely stocked bar and two bartenders. Behind the row of 5 small tables up on the wall there are Japanese "slot machines." I am not sure what kind of games they actually are, but each one is in a fake plastic color of bright red or bright yellow and has various blinking lights and happy dancing icons. They look very inviting, but as they are gambling machines, all of the coin slots are sealed.

The drinks are not inexpensive but Jason's screwdriver was made with fresh squeezed orange juice and my Dragon concoction was very good (if a little sour for my taste.)

Walking through the place I liked the different style compartments that packed into this restaurant. There was a sushi bar, with a yellow motif. Behind it was an open area wok based cook area (I believe) that was in more muted colors. Then in the far back away from all of the hub bub was a more quiet and personal section, for couples that want to whisper in peace.

We lingered a bit, but just as we were finishing our drinks, the waitress shooed us away from near her station and we decided it was time to leave anyway.

I very liked this place and want to come back with a mid size group for dinner. I give it 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Hotel Bar/Lounge
Class: Mid-Scale

I have absolutely nothing bad to say about the Cloud Room. In fact I love this place to death. It is located in the historic and slightly run down Camlin Hotel right on the northern edge of downtown.

One half of the Cloud Room is a high-end restaurant with excellent food. The other half is a piano bar with plush red chairs. In the center is banquet room that seats about 12 and in the back is a balcony that looks out over the highway. The one thing that every room has though is a view. That view ranges from the Space Needle and Queen Anne, to an apartment building and the highway. So it is true that you really need to pick your spot, but at sunset, it really doesn't matter where you stand as the soft light filters through the entire lounge.

The drinks are good, but who really notices them, when compared to the view. The staff ranges from friendly to standoffish, and while I have not actually heard their lounge singer, I imagine he simply adds to the experience.

The clientele is a mix of upwardly mobile locals, and low scale hotel guests. The guests of the Camlin are an interesting mix, but it is still a little hard to pick them out up in the Cloud Room.

All in All, I love this place and give it 5 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Hotel Bar/Restaurant/Lounge
Class: Upscale

The 727 is everything that a high-end bar and restaurant should be. Located in the Elliot Grand Hyatt, it has everything that you could possibly want from a high-end location, except maybe for inexpensive prices.

Coming in from the street you walk down a small set of stairs. On your left is a small comfortable lounge area raised over the rest of the bar. There low chairs, low tables, and waiters popping up and down to make sure everyone has everything they need. Following another small set of stairs down, you walk into the restaurant proper with a very attractive and well-stocked bar off to your left. The hostess is gracious and did not even blink an eye at our "very casual" dress. There was no talk of dress codes or anything that made us feel out of place, despite my initial concern. Looking further into the restaurant, we could see that there was another level further down with more seating next to the open kitchen area.

The decor of the 727 was chic and stylish. Sort of a neo minimalist chic, that was all shiny metal and light polished wood. The bar area was silver and glass and looked really swank. Waiters walked passed us with amazing looking meals, and this conical serving platform of French fries made we want to the $8 (I think) for a plate of them, but my number recollection may be a bit off. Jason and I were both pleasantly pleased with our eye candy selection, cute well-dressed women for me, clean cut, tall blonde men for him.

Now I realized that this was a nice place, but when I placed down a $20 for two well drinks (Screwdriver, G&T) I expected a little more than $7.50 back. Needless to say, I just smiled, left a tip and took the drinks back to the raised island where we were sitting. I had just started to gripe about the drink prices when I took my first sip. I can unequivocally say, that this was the best G&T that I had ever had. I don't know what was in it, but goddamn was it good. It was perfectly mixed, used an incredible gin and was everything I ever dreamed that a G&T could be. Jason and I joked that they well booze must be better than the named booze I usually order (Tanqueray.) We envisioned a conversation going like this:

"Hi I'd like a Tanqueray and Tonic."
"Are you sure sir, our basic Gin is of a much greater quality than that." The bartender then follow with a very sniff.
"Uh sure. But how much better quality."
"Oh, about 3 steps. I would have to charge you more for the Tanqueray as you asked for it by name, but I really don't recommend it."

And so I would happily drink well drinks here forever and never, ever know what kind of gin they used, except for the fact that it wasn't Tanqueray.

For morbidities sake we check out the menu. Everything sounded great, but the "Bar Crunch" for $3 struck us as a little odd.

Having said all that, I must simply say that at 727 you pay for the best and you get the best. If I have someone that I want to impress, I will be taking them here. I give 727 5 Martini Glasses placed stylishly on a chic countertop out of 5.

-w00t

Type: Irish Pub
Class: Neighborhood

The Old Pequliar is medium sized building that has been designed to look like a pub. It has the traditional faux Old World wood exterior with the dark shingles that tell you there is heavy drinking inside. Opening the door you almost run into a table that is spaced a little too close to the front door and is always empty, except when the place is totally packed. The interior of this pub has a homey, almost closed in feel to it. It is always dim, smoky, and a little claustrophobic in the front. This is despite the fact that there is actually quite a bit of room and seating in the front area. I think that it has something to do, with how many tables are packed into this area and the spacing of the pillars. To explain, there are a number of pillars throughout the place and they are located in kind of annoying places. There is one between the door and the bar, and there is another one that compresses the walking space past the bar up to the back room. Most people probably wouldn’t notice it, but I like to be able to walk with having to shift myself (unless of course I am shouldering my way to the front of a concert hall.

Sitting at the end of the bar, we ordered drinks and got sassed by the bartender (I know this is kind of chauvinistic, but I only use the word sassed when speaking about females.) I have to admit that I liked the sassing. It was nice. Bartenders with spunk are fun, but it was hard to say if she was naturally surly/sassy or if it was just her Friday night modus.

The Pequliar has a back area with a couple of high tables, a single pool table, a single dart board, and a small “lounging” area, with comfortable looking/run down chairs. It was kind of hard to tell without walking up to them.

The drinks were slightly below average. A little weak for the price, but it was Friday night, so who knows. I will mention that you probably shouldn’t wear orange when going there. I did and that was I why got sassed. I always forget that some Irish folks still take offense to that color.

The crowd in here is usually young, but tend to have a more jock, lower middle class, or student feel. It seems to attract that kind of crowd that an Irish Pub always seems to attract, which is the kind of good basic people that you often find in the outlying Seattle districts. Not rich people, but just your average middle class/just graduated college students. There are no ex-Microsoft execs hanging out here. I did have a brief coversation with a guy about the All-Blacks, the New Zealand Rugby team. But this really just supports my description.

Anyhow, the Old Pequliar is an ok bar with a decent neighborhood feel. I do recommend that you order the Harp and avoid the wells. I give it 2 and a half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

A good, reliable sports bar. The drinks are acceptable, the place has pool, darts and video games, and everything is pretty much all right with the world while you're there.

Thursdays they have trivia night; get a question right, and your order is half price. Nice for those who have fountains of trivial knowledge to hand.

j.

I mentioned a little about Changes in my journal.

So here's a little more. It's a small place, and kind of worn, but it's not bad. The prices are low (a Finlandia Cranberry and cran was $3.50), the pour is pretty strong, and they have drink specials, too.

There's TVs, but they play the Golden Girls.

The crowd is kind of older and rather male.

Overall, it was a decent sort of place for a drink.

j.

I didn't like this place. The bartender was middle-aged and had obviously seen it all, and didn't care to see us and our crazy little idea. The karaoke was terrible. The place wasn't very big. But then, I was a little drunk at the time, which both makes my perceptions a little skewed, and my memory a little patchy.

Still, it's been my least favorite stop, with the possible exception of Von's. I would recommend skipping it.

Our first stop on the second night, and the place was empty. It's a sports bar, with big TVs, and one lonely pool table and dart board in the back. But there were no sporty types present, in fact, the place was nearly deserted. Which is too bad, because they were friendly, they didn't have a short pour for the drinks like you might expect so close to a college, and it seemed like a nice sort of place to just hang out.

Perhaps this was influenced by running into people I knew, but that's okay. I've got to base my writing on what was happening.

It's a pretty good high-end dive.

Flowers. I've been here often. I really rather like the place. It's an after-work hang out. So there's not much I can say about my visit for the quest, cause it was really short.

Instead, I'll just talk about Flowers.

Get a table. Order some drinks. Have the Prince Mazza plate. They'll bring you more pita if you run out. And enjoy yourself. Cause you will. The wait staff is friendly, and if you get there early enough to actually claim a table, a good time will be had by all. Perhaps that's why the place is always so full.

Highly recommended.

It's both classy and not. I like the front of the bar, which has a few (slightly wobbly) tables, a nice looking bar, stools, the whole thing. But in the back, in the performance space, it all looks a little iffy.

Still, it was good. The place is pretty pleasant, the staff seems very casual, and the drinks are all right. I commend them for supporting bands. I'm not sure what, if anything, could get made better. But it seems like something might be improvable.

All in all, a pretty decent place. I'd go back.

I talked a bit about this place in my journal. Very little more to add. Just that I very much like the weirdly ecclectic feel of the place, and I think you should all go there, often, to watch bands.

Just avoid the fog machines.

This is a good place. A nice looking hotel bar, in the Warwick Hotel across from the Cinerama Theater. Very classy, and the staff is very pleasant. The drinks are good, and while they're a little spendy, it's worth it for both the look of the place, and the relative isolation. You're in a quiet sort of hotel bar, which is nice, and it would be a good place for an intimate little date. They have a bar menu, which while not full, is certainly adequet.

So bring your date to the Brasserie, and have a good time.

Very nice. Too nice for me, really. This place screams quality, from the tasteful surroundings to the so-fresh-there's-chunks-of-orange juice. The drinks weren't weak, the staff wasn't surly even though we rather obviously didn't belong there, and it wasn't a bad experience in any way.

While I wouldn't go back there normally, it'd be a good place for something special.

They're a restaurant, too. Mainly, even. With, as I understand it, rather good food. But that's outside of my area of concern.

Type: Restaurant
Class: Midscale

Desert Fire is a southwestern themed restaurant at the top of the Pacific Place mall. For mall food it is pretty good, but then again, the Pacific Place is a pretty nice mall. Jason and I went there for dinner in order to kill some time before the Two Towers Trailer.

The Desert Fire motif is both interesting and lame, depending on where you focus. Looking up at the antler lamps just makes you think of a bad family restaurant. However, looking at the cool wrought iron menu holders and bar flourishes, it is easy to forget the stupidity of looking up.

The menu is excellent and they have the best breadsticks and “southwest” cream cheese. They are terribly dangerous because all I want to do is sit there and nosh on breadsticks. Mmmmmm … tasty, tasty breadsticks.

My drink was average and priced at about $4. There is a patio, which I recommend if the weather is good. The staff is friendly and helpful and it is an all around decent place. It doesn’t really have much in the way of a bar atmosphere. You’d be better off going over to Gordon Birsch next door if you insist on drinking in a mall.

I give Desert Fire 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Denny’s
Class: Denny’s

Now what could I possibly say about Denny’s here. I will simply sum it up as follows: It is Denny’s. It has a bar. You can get drinks while you eat your Dagwood at 2:00 in the afternoon. Now come on, what were you expecting. I can’t even rate this. I just can’t do it. Could you?

-w00t

I've been to the Rickshaw many times before. It is perhaps the best place I know to go with a hangover for a morning after. And while I wasn't quite hungover when we went there, it was a near thing. They have ample food, and great crappy diner coffee, and I just like the joint.

They also have a full bar. Which is open for an hour after the restaurant is closed, although our waitress pretty much assured us you could still get food in that hour, cause the cooks were still there, as they were also the clean up crew.

Really, though, this was just a gimme. We were there, the booze was there, and the prices were super cheap.

They also have drink specials, and happy hour for like 9 hours in the morning/afternon. Check it out.

A decent place. Nice looking inside. Drinks were okay. There's nothing much to really report about it.

A big brew pub, but with a full bar also. I understand they make their own beer, but I've heard it's a problem for a number of people. For me, the drink was fine, but the place was a bit too big and empty for me to really have liked it.

I mentioned quite a bit about this place in my journal. And I don't know that I have much to add. They give good value for your dollar, since their singles are almost doubles. That's important to note. Other than that, I think I've said all I need to elsewhere.

How much did I like this place? Enough to say it's in the top three of the places we've been, hanging at present with the Tin Hat and the Cloud Room. It's a great bar, with friendly people, including our great bartender Florence. And the drinks are fine, they gave us stuff for the next night's giveaway a night early, there's pool. What more does one need. Visit the Wild Rose, ready for two things: a good time, and (important) the fact that it's a lesbian bar. Which won't stop the first thing, but you should at least be ready for it.

Highly recommended.

Fancy restaurant/bar. Very nice looking, too. The food looks great, the drinks are quality, and they have a list of house special drinks. However, the bar is not very large, and standing room is highly limited. We ended up standing at the edge of the waitress station, which was pretty much in the way of everything, so we got shooed off a bit snippily, which is understandable, but still not something to encourage. Rather than be a bother any longer, we gulped and ran.

For a good night out, could be good, but as just a bar, it's too small and too crowded.

Ah. The Cloud Room. I love this place. It's got the most incredible deck outside, 11 floors up. Okay, the view isn't much, because the sides are very high. For the real view, reserve the banquet room, or get a table in there on a busy night when it's broken up into smaller tables. But there's just the open sky all above you, and a few buildings visible, and the hum of the city all around, but muffled. There's splashing fountains in season, and the whole deck is just incredible, really.

The drinks aren't bad either, although since it's a hotel bar, they aren't all that cheap. But really, the attraction here is the location, not the drinks, and the location is very, very hard to beat.

Highly, highly enjoyable in season. From the start of spring to the middle of autumn, on a clear day this is one of the best bars in town. And I'll say that without having been to most of the bars in the city, and I'm willing to bet I'll stick with my opinion throughout the quest.

This is a classy place. Lots of hardwood, lots of attractive staff, a good look, good lighting. It's the sort of place people with disposable income should spend time, and from the level of busy-ness, it seems like they do.

The drinks aren't cheap. In this setting, you shouldn't expect them to be. What you should expect, and won't be disappointed with, is the quality. The gin and tonic at the 727 was the best I've tasted, and my screwdriver was pretty damn tasty, too. Not that you can do much with well drinks, which leads me to wonder what their specialty drinks might be like. If I had the money, I'd definitely go back, but as I don't, I can only recommend it to those with the cash that they do return, early and often.

The bar is nice looking, but we didn't sit there. We sat in the restaurant and had drinks with food. So I can't say much about the bar, except that the back side is really rather private looking, wedged between the bar and the kitchen wall in a dim, mood-setting space that seemed rather overlooked to me.

The drink I had was fine. Nothing special.

I want a bar to say something really bad about, and it's Von's. They proclaim in various pieces of signage to have the best martini in Seattle. Perhaps this is true, but I won't ever find out. Von's sucks ass.

By this I mean, it's a sport's bar, except it has no pool tables, no darts and no TVs. But otherwise the decor is similar, and the feel is much the same. The bartender who helped me was the cheesy sort who comped the girls in front of me, already in possession of their (personally selected) drinks, free shooters of something. And presented them with a grin that said he wanted a non-cash tip. I quote the great Wanda Sykes: "Remember me? I'm the Drink Man. I bought you that drink, now you owe me."

And, for more than five dollars, they serve you up a luscious little well drink made with MONARCH vodka or MCCORMICK'S gin. Not that I have a problem with cheap alcohol. I serve it often at my parties. But, and note this, I don't have the audacity to charge five bucks a pop for the crap. It didn't even have the dignity to be a strong drink.

So what can one say about Von's? I'd like to say it's better than sitting at home staring at a white wall, but I can't. It's not.

I love places like this. Places where different types meet and ignore each other. In this case, the Old Pequliar is a bar that was once, one suspects, home to a regular crowd of working class guys who drank there often, and often in lieu of time with the family. I know the type, since all my various fathers fit into the group, and my mother, working at a bar most of my life, is part of it by default. I like the type, really. They're friendly people, once you belly up to the bar.

Then there's the new young crowd who have moved into Ballard these last five or ten years. Poor, vaguely hip, neither rich nor cool enough for the best spots. But close enough.

The groups don't mix. But neither of them is ready to give up the ghost, and so they both show up. There're not so many of the middle aged guys now, but they're still there in small numbers.

And I love bars like that.

We only stopped in really briefly, and had our drink, and left. Too college for me, unless I'm with my college friends, and I wasn't.

A plus--the waitress flipped Brandon shit about how she didn't expect him to be able to pay. Shows what wearing you Milwaukee Jail shirt will get you. Kind of funny, though.

I think I've said all that needs be said about the experience. But about the bar--it's actually seperate, there's booths, you can order the full Denny's menu, I think there's even a dart board. Sadly, although Denny's is open all night, state liquor laws require the bar to still close at 2 am, and then it sits empty for (I presume) the minimum four hours before once again opening at 6 am.

Type: Irish Pub
Class: Upscale

Fado has an interesting but unassuming storefront down on First Avenue a block up from Pioneer Square. It has various Irish instruments and artifacts in the windows, but they are so dark and blocked up that you would never know what a huge and potentially hoping place lies inside.

The Décor is nice mix of the traditional Irish Pub, an interesting theme for each room, and upscale artifacts that decorate each area. There is a large bar with an attractive bartender. In all, I think that there are about four or five separate rooms, each with a different theme. There is an “old world” kitchen, an Irish pub, a chic dinning area, and then one or two more. This is a great place to go with a large group (say up to about 10) if you grab the right spot. There are a number of large seating areas and the back is great for a group that is willing to mill.

The group of people that were in Fado on a Tuesday night were a mixture of couples, and small groups of early twenties students/Seattle office workers (hard to tell some days.) It was a nice mix of people, but as I have been finding in bars, the best place to meet other people, is sitting at the bar.

The drinks were average, but a little pricey. It seemed like a nice place, and I could imagine just how packed it was on the weekends. It doesn’t have a dance floor of any sort, so I suspect that the only pastimes to engage in while here is drinking and talking to people Depending on whether you a people person or an alcoholic then that might be right up your alley.

I give Fado 3 Martini Glasses out of 5

-w00t

Type: Dance Bar
Class: Chic

You can tell immediately that the Contour takes itself very seriously. It has a large plate glass store front that allows you to see its large swooping bar, the flashing lights from the dance floor in back and the “pretty people.” Outside there is a large bouncer and a guy sitting in front of a cash register. Fortunately for us, it was a Tuesday night at like 10:30 and there was no cover. Of course there was no crowd or either, but that is fine. The frisking was fairly thorough, but as was pointed out in the Long Kiss Goodnight, “a man is usually unwilling to touch another man’s Mr. Willy.” (Misquoted, I’m fairly sure, but you get the idea.” The bouncer did grab Jason’s Leatherman, which annoyed me more than it did him.

The décor inside is very nice. The chic looking furniture, a stylish bar, and some very interesting wall art. There is a bizarre modern art bust or bodies behind the bar, which I found interesting, but Jason did not like. There was also a huge door/gate that I think was made from an enormous mold hanging on the wall. It looked antique and kind of gothic. Anyhow, it was huge and cool looking. In the back they had paper lanterns and a dance floor with Sims style spinning lights. A DJ was up on a tiny stage with not a person on the dance floor or even vaguely looking like they were going to go near.

There were a couple of attractive women at the other end of the bar, but they were talking quietly amongst themselves, must like we were. There was maybe 2 or 3 other people in the place, but I could tell on the weekends that this place would be packed with the type of crowd that needs to be frisked before being let in. The bartender says that they often have mid shelf DJs through, most notably DJ “Who the fuck cares”. Needless to say, he wasn’t much of a house fan. Contour would definitely be a good location to listen to a high end DJ as the venue is small enough that you could really feel the music. There is an added bonus being pressed up against the hotties on the dance floor as there is no where else to go.

Oh, and the drink was fine, if overpriced, but it was still better than Von’s or Murphy’s (and yes, I am going to bash these two places for the next 300 bars cause I hated them so much.)

All in all, a good place if you like house/techno and are willing to put with that crowd. I give in 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

Type: Irish Pub
Class: Middle Class

The Owl and Thistle is located down behind Pioneer Square, but that doesn’t stop people from finding it, and a damn lot of people find it often. This is easily one of the most popular Irish Pubs in the city and it is easy to see why. It has a front dining room with a touch of class. It is set aside from the rest of the bar so that you can eat in peace, but still listen to the din of nightlife while you chow.

The bartenders are friendly and mix you a generous pour, but this really is a beer primary place. The back area has seating and a small stage for live music, which there is usually. They almost always have someone playing who I have never heard of, but turn out to be pretty good never the less. If you can get a seat, I recommend that you guard it jealously and only let attractive women, or me come sit with you.

There is also a side pseudo sports area where the rabble can talk and drink without being annoyed by the live music. While the music area is dimly lit for atmosphere, all of that is stripped away over here. The lights are bright, the chairs and tables are cheap, and it reminds of most places when last call is gone and past and they want you to get the fuck out. There is a pool table, 2 dart machines, and I would swear a jukebox, but maybe I am hallucinating.

The crowd is much more male oriented, and there are not many groups of single women coming down here. A women here is probably with a guy, or serving you drinks. If you want a good place to pick women, this is probably not your place.

Anyhow, I liked this place, but my main complaint is that it is located downtown and I despise looking for parking. All that being said though, I give it 3 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

Type: Restaurant
Class: Chic

Parking in front of the Flying Fish turned out to be a happy coincidence. We were originally going to the Cyclops, but since we were parked in front of a place that had a bar open till 2 am, we figured why not. From the outside The Flying Fish is fairly unassuming in appearance. It has a large plate glass front, but it does not really draw your vision inside. It just appears like one of Seattle’s many trendy little places that scattered so readily about the city. Opening the door, the first thing that catches your attention though is the smell, and damn does it smell good. I don’t know what they were cooking, but it had the smell of good food, well spiced, and of high quality.

Walking through the small seating area, we went to the bar. It was high and the chairs were comfortable. The tables are a sleek black with matching china. The effect is very elegant and inviting. It made the trendy part of my heart sing. The bartender, Chris, was extremely friendly and seemed to be keeping himself busy, on a slow Tuesday night around midnight. Now I will say, that despite the unusual time of the week, there were two groups having food, and another having drinks.

The drinks were tall and strong and appropriately priced. A little on the pricey side, but at least you get what you pay for. Looking at the menu, we were salivating. If only the $40 we would have spent on dinner would not be better spent on four more bars. We can’t go spending our money frivolously, now can we.

Chris was the perfect image of a movie bartender. He had something to say on each subject if you looked like you wanted his opinion. He was clean cut, made good drinks, and he was always cleaning something. He has been the first bartender I have seen who looked like he was plucked directly from a Humphrey Bogart film. I want all my bartenders to be like Chris. Well except for the hot female versions of Chris that must exist out there.

The conversation was good, the food looked excellent, the décor was lovely, and the drinks were great. I give 4 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

I begin to wonder how many Irish bars there are in this city.

But this one is a nice one. Lots of wood, lots of seperate spaces, good lighting. Almost every inch of every wall, and the windows, are taken up with memoribilia, almost all of it Irish in nature, with a few things booze or sports related, but even then, Irish-oriented.

We were there for a birthday drink with my friend Bridgette, who was turning 26. And this was bar 26, so that was a nice coincidence.

I like the place. The drinks were nothing special, but they weren't bad, either. And the dining space, which is dark and empty at night, chairs piled on tables, the shining light of the bar marking out paths on the hardwood floors, was somehow romantic. In that doomed, abandoned way which comes lies close to my heart. But really, it made it seem like there was this bar, and just around the corner, there were these dim rooms where you might perhaps, as unlikely as it would seem, see a couple slow dancing to music only they could hear.

I like that sort of thing, and if only for that little moment of possibility, I liked Fado. But fortunately, there was more to like, as I've said above.

They have live music several nights a week, and on Sundays, they have a couple hours set aside for amatuers, apparently.

A very large man of Pacific Islands origin frisked us going in, and said he was going to keep my mini-Leatherman tool, as its scissors and very short night were apparently too menacing. And I guess it's that sort of place on the weekends. But on this Tuesday, just after Fado, there was nothing to the place. A half-dozen patrons sat at the bar, counting us, while in the dance space at the far side of the club, a DJ spun the tunes for a non-existant dance squad.

Our bartender helpfully explained, in answer to our queries, that there was indeed a weekend cover of five or ten dollars, depending on who they had DJing, although a really big DJ might be more. And that, in reference to an earlier call about who was spinning that night, he had answered, "DJ Who Gives A Fuck?"

I liked our bartender.

The club is pretty. Copper bar, weird nude statuary of partial bodies, a strange but lovely purple faux stained glass window. A very attractive space. On the weekends, it's apparently wall to wall with people.

The drinks were made with crappy alcohol, but a lot of it. Mixers were apparently solely present so that drinks could be called "mixed" because there was very little decrease in alcohol strength.

However, there wasn't much to do, and you couldn't even people watch, since there were just the six of us. So while we lingered over our drinks a moment, after they were gone, we left immediately.

Another Irish bar. But this one is like three bars in one. First, there's the front room, which during the day is the main restaurant portion of the establishment. There's a number of tables, with the best seating (still not great) and a wall of books, all big old monsters. I didn't notice those until leaving, so I thought at first rather poorly of this front room, with its moderate lighting, quiet seating and one table of ladies having cocktails.

The next room featured a very large man checking IDs. He had a name tag on, saying, "Hello, My Name Is
HAN SOLO
PANTS"
because, you see, he was wearing pants like Han Solo, sort of. This room featured the performance space, and indeed, before we left a band which passably approximated a rock band was playing. The bar was also in this room, so we ordered. It was dim in the back room, and I didn't feel like dim, so we moved on to the last room.

It's the dive portion of the place. There's a pool table, and tables with vinyl chairs that are torn, stuffing showing through. There's two electronic dart boards, and one wooden one. There's another bar, but it's closed, and small in any case. And you can see, quite clearly, into the kitchen.

I should note that the pool table was in use, by several very adorable guys. Perhaps this has influenced me positively toward Owl and Thistle, but I got a good feeling about the place.

The drinks were not bad, the whole bar was pretty decent in a low class sort of way, and there were plenty of options for what to do, and in what setting to do it. I liked the place, and I'd go back.

It's a shame to call this place a bar. It's a restaurant, you see, but the bar stays open two hours past dinner, so while we were there, it was a bar. But we just missed dinner time, and so the scent of the kitchen was still thick in the air. And what a scent. The place serves mostly sea food, but this smell wasn't at all fishy. Succulent, savory, a hint spicy, it was perfection on the air.

Our bartender Chris was a great guy. He served us up very tasty wells, got us a full dinner menu even though it was just midnight at we were technically too late (we didn't order, but it all looked good on paper), and when we told him about the quest, he didn't look at us crazy. In fact, he suggested places we should go in West Seattle when we went there. Friendly, helpful, obliging. All the things a good bartender would be in a perfect world, and Flying Fish was seeming pretty perfect.

Just a couple of complaints, and they're small. Speaking of which, the bar. It's tiny. Just an add on to the restaurant, I suspect, so there's just a couple tables and the bar with maybe ten stools. It's not sizable, but it was cozy, and that was good. Second, the food smelled too good. I know, that's a stupid complaint, but when you need to save money as much as we do, it's best to not spend it on probably incredible food that is sadly priced what it's worth.

Other than that, I liked it a lot. It fits well with 727 and the Dahlia Lounge in the classy place list, which is sadly rather short, and not likely to get all that much bigger. But we'll see.

A one bar night. Goofy's is pretty much what the name says. Goofy. I like it though. There's lots of space, which all seems kind of thrown together. There's a couple pool tables, darts, a few video games, fake fires with real heat, pull tabs, karaoke. It's pretty much got everything, in one reasonably sized package.

But for all that, it's kind of goofy, as I said. Thrown together does describe the space, but that's about the only way it could be put together, since they do perhaps a bit much for the space they have. And while there's a few young types, the bar's also home to a definite older crowd, which is a mix I enjoy (see the Old Pequliar, #24) but which only adds to the wacky feel of the place. Then there's the chairs, which are very, very short.

The drinks? Well, they were weak. But for a neighborhood bar, with probably very much regulars, it's no shock that walk ins get weak drinks. That's what I'd expect, and that's what we got.

Still, it was worth the trip if only for the two girls and a guy who couldn't sing Destiny's Child to save their lives.

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Lower Middle Class

I don’t really know what to say about this place other than the fact that it has character. It has a lot of character. Walking in and turning to look at the bar, you notice two things right off: 1) the Bartenders are definitely locals, and that there are piles of “merchandise” stacked on top of the bar. Now I can only assume that the boom boxes, bobble head dolls, blow dryers, and what not are prizes for bar games that they play there. Because otherwise, I can not imagine what is either stored inside the boxes, or what other possible purpose they could have.

We ordered our drinks, and I quickly got the feeling that this is the type of place where you want to get to know the bartender and fast. My drink was weak, with a capital EAK! I just kept tasting this really bitter kind of horrible taste in my mouth, and I finally figured out that it was the Tonic I was tasting. I don’t normally taste that much straight tonic in my drinks. Anyhow, the point of this, is that there was were many customers greeting the bartender by name and I suspect that if you are regular then you get a real pour, otherwise, you cope.

Goofy’s is also one of those “fun” bars, where they always have something going on for the clientele to do. There was Karokee when we got there, and I could see signs for upcoming events, and drawings and whatnot. There is a pool table in back as well as a couple of video game machines. I suspect that they do a brisk business, but that there is not a lot of variety in the people who come here.

Oh, one other things struck me as interesting. They are a Camel bar, approved bar. You can tell this by the fact that they had a fuckload of camel advertising up. Numerous lit and unlit signs, all advertising various brands of camel cigarettes. We had learned about this from the Camel Death Merchant that we met at the Sit and Spin and how that the Sit and Spin wasn’t Camel Compliant because they didn’t have enough signage up.

Anyhow, Goofy’s all in all wasn’t very good, but if you live close, I wouldn’t necessarily avoid it either. I give it 2 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

This is a blue collar joint, no bones about it. It's plain, it's few occupants are older guys who have obviously spent a lot of time working, and the walls are covered with memoriblia of the history of Seattle, labor being a primary focus. The decor is all left over from the Sixties and Seventies, and I think most of the patrons are, as well. The bartender is a guy in his forties wearing bib overalls like he was a train engineer. He brings out coffee to an old guy who wanders in without being asked to bring it. It's that kind of place.

The waitress was very attentive, very friendly. There was very cheap pool at the single table. The drinks didn't suck, and tonight marks the change of drinks, from a screwdriver to a vodka cranberry (Cape Cod).

So what can I say about the Dock? I'd never have gone there, and I'm not likely to ever go back. But for their crowd, I guess it's okay. It's just not, in any way, a place for me.

From outside, this tiny place looks kind of menacing. So menacing our unofficial photographer Kathryn, despite living two blocks away, has never been here. It looks like the kind of dive where you don't get out safe without a lot of tattoos and muscles, or the right kind of bike, or something.

It's not like that at all.

I loved this place. The music was punk-ish, the crowd was mixed, the drinks were decent, and while it's really small inside, they still manage to cram in a pool table. The bartenders were nice and seemed to be just ordinary people, something I like in a bartender.

We met a couple of ladies here, Jennifer and Rachel, and they were very cool to hang with, even if it was only for a few minutes.

And we talked with the bartender, Valerie, who recommened we skip the Red Door as a night time bar, and gave enough reasons to actually compel us to do so. She said she wanted to see us there again, and while she likely won't, cause we've got a lot of bars to hit, I think everyone in the world should descend on this tiny gem and buy many drinks.

Sorry I didn't learn the other YMCA Soccer guy bartender's name. Seems kind of a poor show when we learned so much else.

Anyway, go there. It's great. It's in the obscurest part of Fremont, but still, I loved it. And you will, too.

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Blue Collar

The Fremont Dock is, surprise, surprise, located right near the docks in Fremont. It is a housed in a plain uninteresting building, but the windows are clear and you can see people playing pool and drinking inside. I immediately like the place when I walk in. It is spacious, has two giant TVs on either side of the bar and the bar itself is long and inviting.

Now mind you, the bar is populated by only the saltiest of dogs at this time of night (it is about 11:30PM on a Thursday.) The bar staff seems to be just as “salty” as the clientele is. Now I must admit that I don’t really have anything in common with good hardy blue-collar workers, mostly because by their standards, I have never really worked a day in my life. Physical labor and I don’t really get along. I don’t mind exercise but work, well, that is why I have a good job.

In the back, they have a pool table that costs .75 cents and is free on Sundays from 4PM till close. They also have the tackiest zebra style walls that you have ever seen. It is your stock inside exposed wood look, painted black, and then given white stripes. It is not good, but it is tacky, and I love tack.

The drink was mixed strong, and that is always a plus. The waitress was attentive, if not extremely friendly. We spent a decent amount of time here, waiting for K-dog to get her but down here. I really liked this place, and would probably come back, but only if I made sure to dress in my denim. I give it 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

$5 dollar wells. This is what counts in my world as a warning. And when the well is made with mostly mixer, I like it even less.

That was the Triangle. Weak drinks for a high price. What more could be said?

Well, plenty. They had a DJ working his craft, and he was decent, although sadly I have no idea who he was. The crowd was very guy-heavy, which should work for me, but unfortunately they were not at all attractive. I could have been much more pleased with a bunch of cute girls. In fact, I was, at the Wild Rose. Go there, and skip the Triangle.

But perhaps I'm too hard on them. Weak drinks and blah crowd aside, I'm told they're so packed on the weekends you can't get a table, and the bar is hard to reach. Oh, wait, those aren't really selling points, either.

So would I recommend it? No. But if you're in the area, and all the other bars in the neighborhood seem to far, maybe you should stop in. The seating, if you can get it on whatever night you come in, is okay. So that's something.

Oh, and I did hear the oddest conversation ever in the men's room.

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Middle Class

The Pacific Inn is one of those rare finds which is why we started this quest. K-dawg has walked past this place a million times and has always been afraid to go in. Now I will admit that it looks like a total dive from the outside, and I would never willingly choose to go in here, rather than wandering over to Fremont to go to someplace, “nice.” Walking in we immediately knew that all of our preconceptions were wrong.

On the jukebox, there was punk playing (I’m not sure who), but it was classic and it was good. There were several attractive women sitting at the bar and the bartender was doing tricks with matches trying to impress them. There are several four-person booths along the left side when you walk in and a small seating area and pool table in the back. It is a very friendly place to sit and the bartenders are happy to make small talk as long as they are not burning themselves.

I ended up sitting next to a girl and we made some small talk. She mentioned that she was a bartender by trade, but couldn’t find a steady gig up here. She told me about a Nuts and Berrys which is Chamborg on the bottom, Kahlua, Vodka, and tonic, not mixed. Then you drink it quick with a big straw and it hammers you fast. She also mentioned that a Slippery Nipple is actually made with some foul anise flavored liquor (I can’t think of its name) and not Buttershots at all. Maybe Jennifer will post the answer to this question, and also what the Buttershots/Bailey’s drink is actually called.

We met Jennifer, the girl I was talking to, Valerie, the other bartender, and Rachel (briefly) Jennifer’s friend. Before we headed out, Jennifer mentioned that she works at Hoyt's on Saturday. So Hoyt's on Saturday it is.

The drink was good and priced at $3.50. Oh we finally found a place where they charged extra for fruit juice rather than extra for tonic. I think it had something to do with the fact that when the bartender ran out of Cranberry juice, he refilled the server bottle from a giant family size bottle of Ocean Spray. Well at least they use quality.

Now I should say, that there is nothing really here but some good drinks, a cozy atmosphere, friendly people, and great music. But for some reason it just felt like enough.

I very much want to go back to this place, but it will be a while before we are allowed. I give this place 4 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

Type: Night Spot
Class: Trendy

The Triangle really wants to be a great trendy place. It has a cool sign, attracts young pretty people, has an in house DJ (at least they did on Thursday, when we were there), is decorated in dark reds and blacks and has a giant lit up Prescriptions sign.

Now I will admit, that it has the right feel. It feels trendy and it even attracts young, trendy people. But that is no excuse for serving crappy overpriced drinks. You know my one cardinal rule, and they broke it. The drinks for $5 a piece and they were weak. Weak like a little girl trying to lift up one of those giant pixie sticks. Now this drink was not Murphy’s weak, or Von’s crappy, but it wasn’t anywhere near being $5 good.

So I will make this review short by saying the following: This is a great place to go to meet young trendy people and stare at hotties who won’t talk to you because they are young and trendy. I do recommend however that you drink liberally in your car before you walk through the door, nurse the drink you buy, and you better be damn sure that the girl that you are buying that drink for is actually interested in talking to you and not just trying to get out of buying her own $5 drinks. Oh, and you probably shouldn’t let her name her alcohol, as I suspect that will push you up to $6.50.

I give the Triangle 3 Martini Glasses out of 5 as long as you go drunk.

-w00t

Type: Night Spot
Class: Young

Up on Capitol Hill is Linda’s Tavern. This is a regular looking night spot both inside and out. It is a good place to sit around and have a drink while talking to your friends. There are a number of attractive women who come here, but this is really a sit around and talk to your own friends kind of place. There is not a lot of room to mill about and just make your way over to someone without looking like you are heading right for them.

The drinks are average, and priced about right. The bartender was very cute, and I very much liked her accent. I think it was Eastern European or possibly Baltic, but it was definitely sexy.

We sat on the porch in the back and that was actually really nice. They have greatly improved their porch area since last time I was there. They have now covered most of it, and installed heat lamps. The night wasn’t that cool to begin with, but I was out there without my jacket on, in a short sleeve shirt and it was perfectly comfortable.

I believe they have a jukebox, but I didn’t really notice the music as we were outside. Oh, I do have one major complaint about the place. The bathroom situation leaves much to be desired. The two bathrooms are located in a very small hallway that connects the porch to the bar, and if there is more than 2 people in a bathroom, the rest spill over into the hallway and clog it up. The bathroom itself is not well maintained, and if I remember correctly, the door to the toilet has been taken off the hinges. Now I don’t want to be stereotypical, but I wonder if that has something to do with them being located on Capitol Hill.

I give Linda's 3 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-w00t

Type: Restaurant
Class: Middle Class

Bill’s is really more of an Italian pizza place with a bar. I have eaten there before, but not in a long while, and as I recall it was really good. Inside there is not really any décor worth mentioning. It looks like your stock home town Italian restaurant where the lighting is vaguely dim and the tables are functional. The furniture is a little nicer than that, but it is still more utilitarian than attractive.

Our waitress was very nice and had the most interesting sequin hearts stuck to her face – 3 in a V on each side. She had fading pink hair put back into wings?, maybe pig tails, no I would remember pig tails. I also noticed at the table next to ours the mostly interesting group of 3 people. There were 2 guys and a girl and they each had a very distinctive look. Guy One: Bright Light Blue hair, all gelled and messy, leather and spikes punker look. Guy Two: Shave head, Maori style tattoos in strip like a Mohawk on his head, dressed in the sweatshirt punker look. Woman: Dark Maroon Hair (Stylish), tight sexy leather, trendy little jacket, but while she looked good, she also looked like she may have been part of the original punk movement in the early 80s, but still looks good.

Anyhow, we couldn’t get food because 1 AM had snuck up on us and our drinks were fine. I recommend this place for food, much more so than for drinks. I give it 2 and half Martini Glasses out of 5 as we are rating bars here, and not restaurants.

-w00t

Type: NightClub
Class: Trendy

Polly Ester’s is Seattle’s best place to go and dance to the 70’s and 80’s. It is actually quiet a great spot. That is if you do what we do. Get there before 9:00 PM on a Saturday (or whenever) when the place is mostly empty and you don’t have to pay a cover. Then drink their happy hour specials until 11:00. Make sure you find out what they are, and don’t let them trick you into ordering a top shelf drink when you want a $3 well. Dance to your hearts content, and then leave by about 11:00 when the dance floor gets so packed that you do not even get your own square, but rather have to share it with 2 other people (and this is not usually a good thing.) If you manage to flirt/pick up on a little cutie then by all means stay, otherwise leave and go to somewhere else to finish off your night in a place where you won’t be packed in like sardines.

The décor in here is split down the middle. On the 70’s side (Polly Ester’s) there are pictures of Pam Grier, Eric Estrada, a giant Twister Board, a stick your head through Brady’s Bunch wall, and generally garish colors (yellow, orange, red etc …) It has a very 70’s feel with its multi-colored light up floor and drinks with names like the Dukes of Hazard. On the 80’s side (Culture Club) there are pictures of Adam Ant, Billy Idol, a dancing cage, darker colors (blues, purples, and blacks), a large MTV symbol, and a smaller dance floor that flashes with purple strips of color. On Saturday Nights they do a live broadcast on 96.5 the Point (free plug bitches - so give me some money) which is actually a really good station. The station identifications within the club are a little annoying, but you just tune them out.

Now because you have taken the time to read this, I am going to let you in a little secret. On the second floor, in the back of Culture Club, by the stairs is a back room called the Red Room. It has couches, chairs, 2 wide screen TVs (which often play bad 80s movies) and usually its own bartender. This is a great place to sit and chill and make you moves on the women. Most people never seem to come back here because it is separated from the main hubbub, but trust me, it is a great place to spend 5 minutes or an hour two. It is like your own little refuge within Polly Ester’s.

I do have to say, that the old movies they play kind of crack me up, but for god sakes, why does Grease have to playing in the 70s rooms EVERY TIME I GO. I mean sheesh, wasn’t Grease II good enough to get some play. You know I’m kidding, right?

The drinks here are about average for most mainstream clubs I have been to, but I usually leave feeling a buzz, even if my pockets are much lighter. I really recommend that pre-funk in the car outside (about 2 or 3 shots worth) but make sure the bouncer can’t smell it. Oh, also, leave your Leatherman at home as they frisk at this place too.

All in all I give Polly Ester’s 3 and a Half Martini Glasses out of 5. It is not a bad place, as long as you know how to make it your bitch and then get out before the mobs overwhelm you.

-wOOt

Type: Neighborhood Bar
Class: Mid-Scale

Hoyt’s Pub is a nice place up on Queen Anne to go and get a drink with some friends and just generally hang out. The entire place is split into 3 main areas within one large room. The front portion is mainly a dining area with some cozy booths. The middle portion is made up of freestanding tables and is good for large groups that want to come and hang out. The back portion is smaller booths and a couple of tables for small groups (we managed 5, but it was tight) for casual conversation. The décor is all dark wood and it is well lit. This would be an excellent place for a first drink as it is friendly looking and does not have lingering uneasiness about it.

Their drinks are very good and reasonably priced (about $4.50). We also had a plate of onion rings that were beer battered and made with large whole onion slices. Most of the food we wanted at 11:00 on a Saturday night was out (like the Jalapeno Poppers) but that is not all that unusual, considering that they were doing a very brisk business that night.

I give Hoyt’s 3 Martini Glasses out of 5. It is a nice place, but there is little remarkable about it. I do however want to give big ups to Jennifer who was waitressing (you might remember her from our visit to the Pacific Inn) there that night.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant
Class: Mid-Scale

I unfortunately have very little to say about this place. We went in there at about 11:45 on a Saturday night and it was almost completely deserted. It is primarily a restaurant so I can understand that it lacked any sort of nightlife feel. The décor was based on a high end Route 66 theme with a kind of underlying automotive feel, but really there was nothing about its look that caught my eye or repulsed me. I can say that it had a huge open kitchen and I can imagine that when the place is hoping it is a lot of fun to watch the chef’s work. There was one thing that I really liked about it. Way in the back, there is a door that leads outside to a tiny porch with a park bench on it that would be great for just two. Unfortunately, if there were anyone in the seating area in back, you would be kind of conspicuous.

The drinks were fine and priced at about $4. I give it 2 Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: NightSpot
Class: Upscale

Walking into the Paragon I was immediately greeted by a live band which was playing fairly decent bar jazz. You know the type, 3 or 4 guys who get together on weekends to jam at a local bar who have fun together but will never make it big. The décor is nice with dark wooden booths, a very long bar with strange little metal sculptures which each hold something useful, but different (like cups of olives, or whatnot.) Running down the middle of the place is a large bar that separates that the “mingling” bar flies from the tables and booths running down the north side of the bar. In the back is a spacious seating area with large booths and a number of tables. This is definitely the dining area and very much feels like it is cut off from the rest of the bar. Well, except for the fact that people headed to the bathroom have to cut right through the middle of this area.

There was a fairly good crowd and it was generally a more well to do, attractive looking crowd. There were a number of older couples, but mostly it is not a bad little nightspot. That was until I got my drink. We paid $5 for the drink and my G&T was just down right weak. I would comment on the quality of the gin if I were able to taste it. I am told that they have good martinis but that does not help me hear. Wolf, who got a shot, congratulated himself for his cleverness after tasting both my G&T and Ryan’s Long Island, which apparently was both weak and made from a mix. This is never a good sign.

On the plus side, there was a very attractive bartender dressed all in black and she had some mad cleavage. Props to Sean for making sure I went up to the bar to look check her out. She really was the high point of this bar.

On the down side, while the band played pretty good bar jazz, they should not be allowed to do covers. They covered Mustang Sally and I nearly wanted to gauge out my own ears with a dull spoon. I suppose the song was over before I would have been able to do it, but not by much.

All that being said, it was not a bad little place, but there are better ways to spend your $5 a drink. I give it 2 and Half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

Type: Restaurant (Family Bar)
Class: Mid-Scale

When we at the Pacific Inn, they warned us away from the Red Door because, and I quote, “They are a family bar. What the fuck is with that.” Valerie’s assessment is an accurate one. We went there for Sunday lunch and our standard one drink on Sunday for even we must rest. The Red Door is a large, fairly uninteresting space that has a lot of standing room, numerous tables, and some of the highest ceilings you have ever seen. The space is well lit by large bay windows around the entire outside during the day and by large floodlights at night.

I will say that the food was excellent, but as I have said before, I don’t rate on the food, and this is not called 570Restaurants.com. Jason ordered a Bloody Mary and I got a Mamosa. We realized that the drink didn’t “count” but since we have the only one person must drink spirits rule, we were safe from having to order a second VERY OVERPRICED drink. Jason’s Bloody Mary came in a tall glass and seemed to have a lot of liquid (the glass was shaped like a thin sundae glass). This is a good thing, I think, since it was $6.50 and it wasn’t very good. It didn’t have enough flavor, enough spice, or enough sweet, to give it any distinguishing flavor at all. Then there was my Mamosa. I don’t really know what to say about this other than the fact that half a glass of champagne and half a glass of orange juice also cost me $6.50. God dammit people, but would you get a grip on yourselves. Now I suspect that they were using $6 a glass champagne and not Totts or Ballatore Spumanti may have something to do with it, but shit man.

As far as being a bar (I have been there at night as well), I can honestly say that if you want to go out to a bar and you want to bring your kids, then this is the bar for you. But if you are like me, then you rate this bar 1 and half Martini Glasses out of 5.

-wOOt

They have a nice courtyard seating area that was both covered with retractable screens, and heated. This was nice, cause the inside of this hipster joint was totally packed, and we had to sit outside. Without the heaters, it would have been unbearable. With the heat, it was great. Sadly, I ended up paying very little attention to the locale, as I was with my friends Chris and Holly, and we had great conversation.

The drink I had was okay, and the Fat Tire beer that followed was certainly good. The place has a sort of divey charm, and it's an establishment, so what can one say? I've been there before, I'll drift back again.

I understand it's normally a restaurant, but it stays open past food time, so we had to go there. And we just missed food, cause the next table was eating pizza, but we couldn't get any. In any case, it pretty much looks like a restaurant that serves booze, rather than having anything like a bar feel. Good conversation continuing from Linda's, there was once again little that I noted. But, since it's a restaurant first, I don't think there was much to notice.

Bill's was mainly notable for being the first bar we've actually closed out since we started this quest. Otherwise, we're pretty much too fast and get out too quick. The cry of "Last Call for Alcohol," is one I really like, so Bill's is a bit special to me, as the first of the quest. Other than that, it was nothing special, good or bad.

The first of a run of four for the night, Poly Ester's (and the Culture Club) was the first active dance place we've been to, as Contour had no dancing going on.

I'll start by saying I like to dance. And I like the 80's. And Culture Club is an 80's dance club. So I like the place. There's no cover before nine, and there are $3 wells until 11, which isn't the greatest, but it's a bargain of sorts. Sadly, Poly Ester's would mark the last bar of the mystery fun money we had, and so the end of our run of bars that seemed, for all intents and purposes, free, a run that started with #18, the Wildrose.

We drank and watched the middle aged dancers. I mean that, too. If you've never been, both sides of the club start out with a lot of people in their late 30s, 40s, even 50s. A few of them stay all night, but the crowd does get younger as time goes on. And at first, there's usually just a few older dancers, and a couple of younger women who, as always, are the first to brave the dancefloor. But as the crowd increases, and as the numbing effects of alcohol convince everyone they can indeed dance, the dance floor fills up, and most of the older dancers depart.

However, some people still shouldn't dance. I refer to the larger couple who danced next to me, taking up excess space by sheer virtue of being big people, and then taking up even more by lame attempts at ball room dancing. I wouldn't complain so much except that I ended up getting decked on the nose by the whirling fat woman, and later headbutted by her when her fat husband dipped her.

Eventually, they left. For which I'm very happy.

But also eventually, the dance floor fills up, and there's very little room. We also had more bars to go to. So Brandon and I, and my brother Wolf who had joined us mere moments after arrival, departed.

I should note the drinks are of average strength, like at most heavily-trafficed clubs, and of ordinary size. Everything comes in plastic, which seems a little cheap, but then you realize how very many people there are in the place, and what a pain glass would be, and you get over it.

I like Poly Ester's/Culture Club. You should go there.

We came to Hoyt's for a repeat visit of Jennifer, one of the women we met at the Pacific Inn. She worked at Hoyt's on Saturdays as a bartender. However, the place was very packed, and we were supposed to be met up with by at least 2 and as many as 5 other people. Which was potential trouble. Still, we just snagged a both, and decided to worry about it if the moment came.

Jennifer is a dear woman, but she's not meant to be serving as a waitress, which was the role she had been pushed into. The drinks were good, but she ended up bringing us two drinks wrong. Sadly, the bar menu was also lacking in many of the items listed, as they were out for the night. A good sign, being out, cause it tends to mean the items are pretty much fresh, but sad for us, because we couldn't get the things we wanted. Still, the onion rings were good. The drinks were also fine.

Partway through, we were joined by Dave and Ryan, who claimed that Sean P. was coming as well. This is not the Sean previously mentioned, the web guy, but rather, another Sean entirely. However, Sean had still not arrived when we finished our drinks and rings, and so we moved on.

Jennifer, if you read this, I hope it's not as crazy next week. We'll probably be back at some point, after the quest is done.

Hoyt's is a very nice looking place, but then, it's on Queen Anne Hill, and the bars there tend to be nicer. The food looked good, too, what I saw at the other tables, and the drinks were reasonably priced.

Just across the street from Hoyt's, the 5-Spot is a bit of a dive. Nothing wrong with that. But it wasn't very busy, seemed in fact rather dead, although the restaurant was closed, and the bar was soon to close. Still, the five of us sat and had a quick drink, and were joined finally by Sean P. The drink was okay, nothing remarkable, and the place didn't make much of an impression. Of course, I can't say whether that's fair, as by this time there were six of us, and we were in a bit of a hurry to make one more bar. Still, a lot of people had told me to got the 5-Spot, and I didn't think it was really worthy of so much commentary.

Very packed.

Blues music.

A table for four, serving for six.

The bar was very crowded, but the staff were quick, and some were quite cute.

The crowd was lively.

Across the aisle, two women and a man, all within a few years of forty, playing quarters. A woman sinks two in a row, then the other woman two in a row. They're not playing for drinks.

The blues band switches to covers. "Mustang Sally" while never my favorite song convinces me I've entered the outer circle of hell. And then mercifully back to blues, after three covers.

People kissing at the bar. And man and woman making out over the divider that seperated our table from the bar area, going at it for fully thirty seconds.

It's that kind of place.

I kind of liked it.

The drinks were weak, weak, weak. Not as weak as Murphy's, and not as bad as Von's or Goofy's, but weak all the same. And not cheap. But a better location will tell, and I think I feel pretty good about Paragon.

Valerie at the Pacific Inn (see how much we mention people we like) said, "Fuck the Red Door. Fucking family-style bar. Fuck them." And so we didn't go here on Thursday, but come Sunday, lunch time, we wandered in, since Valerie had conceded that might work. Brandon and I were met by Wolf and my friend Jeff, who will be mentioned prominently in the Shilshole Connection, and in addition is an all around great guy.

Lunch worked okay. I liked my fish and chips, and there were good things said by everyone else about their sandwiches. Less successful was the completely unremarkably flavored Bloody Mary I ordered, wanting a morning drink (although it was 1 pm). It was big, I'll give it that, but it lacked sweetness, spice or any distinguishing characteristics. Also, it was rather expensive. Even more disappointing was Brandon's Mimosa, which was just plain terrible, and pricey to boot.

So go there for lunch, but skip the drinks. Should we go back again at night to test the waters then? I fall back on the wise Valerie. "Fucking family style bar." I don't think I'll go back for a drink, no.

This begins the Shilshole Connection, an excellent series of bars brought to us (and you) with the generousity of my friend Jeff Ketchel, an upright fellow who offered to sponsor us for three bars we thought would be a bit pricey.

Hiram's was first. There's a nice big restaurant, a small bar area, and a deck outside that was sadly full, as the glorious evening sun was all around, and a deck seat would have been just about perfect. For this night, we're joined by Jeff and by Chris who was with us at Linda's and Bill's a few nights ago. Combined with Brandon, it's a great group, and as Jeff's girlfriend Kristin (sp?) will be joining us soon, it should get better.

Hiram's is a nice looking place. The booths are comfortable, the bar has lots of artfully rusted iron accents, there's a three leveled Lazy Susan of alcohol. The bar menu is small but tasty, and while I can't even think of oyster shooters, apparently they're very good. The drinks were fine, nothing remarkable, but in the spacious, attractive interior, it seems not to matter. The sun was shining, the bar was beautiful, and Gretchen our waitress was understanding about the quest. All was right with the world.

When we told her we needed the check, she just smiled and said she thought so, since there were a lot of bars out there. For all the Gretchens in the world, and this one in particular, we're grateful.

In addition, the drinks were reasonably priced, which was a surprise, cause it's a nice place, and you'd think you'd pay more for a drink. They also have nightly specials during the week, and happy hours, so going can only be to your advantage. Get a table on the deck, slurp some oysters and pound back a couple.

I think others had more problems with Ray's than I did. I should point out they were very, very full. So full there were multiple groups standing in the bar, so that space there was at a premium. With the five of us, as Kristin had now joined us, there was very little room. So we looked longingly out at the deck, where many tables were open, and where the sun was drifting down behind tattered clouds toward the snowy Olympics.

Okay, the view was incredible. So we would have wanted to sit out on the deck anyway, but that was where they had space. So we tried to get a seat, but there was some confusion, and we ended up getting a ticket that implied a 45 minute wait. We got drinks anyway, and drifted ou